Monday, June 08, 2009

Letter to my PMS self

Dear Trina,

I know. I know it feels so awful. I know you are acting ridiculous and can’t stop. I know that there is no solution and there never will be. I know that he is your mortal enemy and the person you trust most and this is exceptionally confusing. I know that you are certain there is a massive conspiracy underlying all that you hold to be true. I know you’re pissed at him for suggesting chocolate because it is so trite and you want it more than anything. I know you’re going to enter that Red Tent in a few days and transform into a blubbering mess of cuddling neediness. I know that only Celine Dion and Shania Twain get it. I know that choking feeling of anger at the world for not understanding. I know you now understand that there’s a time to kill. I know it isn’t fair. I know you’re secretly curious about God’s goodness and thinking this Eve lady is a bitch. I know how you hate your hormones and you’re certain you need a different Pill. I know you feel vulnerable but it’s more important than ever that no one guess that. I know that you want to kick your husband in the balls and mount him and hug and cry. I know.

And, you’re right. And, it’s going to be ok. You’ve made it through the past 221 times and you will again. The truth is, it is a curse and it’s only because of your incredible strength of mind, dazzling heart, crushing inner beauty and drop dead gorgeous exterior that you’ve been given the challenge. You will triumph over the shriveling glands that caused all this. You are a stunning creature. Hear you roar.


Mystery Robin said...

I had to tell myself that just a few days ago. But, I'm never *really* sure that it's me and not the rest of the world that's suddenly gone insane.

Krista said...

Fabulous... and suckage all at the same time.

yates said...

wow, that is great.